Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Should've kissed you there
I should've held your face
I should've watched those eyes
Instead of run in place

I should've called you out
I should've said your name
I should've turned around
I should've looked again

But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made
I'm staring at the mess I made
I'm staring at the mess I made
As you turn, you take your heart and walk away.

<3


my baby baby baby ! :D
Was actually embraced by it .

I really miss the way you use to say it .

Monday, September 28, 2009

Deep sigh .


Man ,life feels so dead right now ..
In additional to that, exams are at sight .Which really sucks .

God ,if i miss school it's exactly the same as missing nothing .
Except the days with ekonomi .

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Impossible

With you this anger of mind will always be ready to pounce .

Friday, September 25, 2009

My lovely red phone .W910i

Is now rosak-ed and unable to run .
I seriously loved that phone and now it's gone ?
Blady dog .Now i got no phone .Wtf man .
I hate you seriously .
Ppl like you ,should nvr see guys like me .

Go date ppl in your league .LIKE CHAN CHAN YEE .Wow his an amazing playa .YOU TWO LOOK
GREAT TOGETHER. You two can play each other .Thats your kind .
PLAYA .What was i even thinking .
I can understand why guys play ,but girls ?
You're the sex which has value .What a stupid thing to do .

OUT ;GOING ;GONE

You should get lost .You're not welcomed here anymore .
Not welcome to even look at me or speak to me .
Get lost ,the way you wanted it .
Now bye .

Tears

My poor ring .
If you knew how much it means to me ;

All it's left is a scar from the wall and nothing to take else eye away from it .

Bull .

Thursday, September 24, 2009

ALAMAK !


School's reopening ,ain't that awesome ?
MY ASS .Haih that means sucky teachers and i mean SUCKY !
They suck at teaching and i should not extend the insult .
Just believe me when i say sucky ,think in every possible way :D
Arghh great .Holidays just had to be on its way .

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Good girl .


No interest in girls who drink
No interest in girls who club
No interest in girls who smoke
No interest in girls who dresses indecently.


`You'd just be another one night stand .
A personality that will turn me off.
I don't mind being a friend to you ,just not anything more.

Breath taking .


I think if i have no pictures i won't update ,i think that should be rule nr1 .
Finally wondered Kota Kemuning .*Not a very safe place
2dreams ,today's one was breath taking .

Something i would not want to get up knowing .

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Sorry.

Screw the word love . The next girl that uses this word on me i'll think of you
and how it was abused .

And end up never beleving in love again.I once never believed in love till you showed.

I DARED TO BE DIFFERENT .I actually opened up to you.You didn't see ,did you ? I always had the thought of growing up single and dying single. Everytime a relative ask .''Rafael do you wana get married?'' And my answer will always be ''no'' . My reason: I would like to live by myself ,worry for myself and not anyone else. And of course there's the financial part of live.Where if i end up not receiving a healthy pay i would have only myself to think of and noone to worry about .I won't die living under poverty.And if i do receive a healthy pay there would always be donations & charity.Struggle on my own is how i live . Till now i'm still doing that.


Human's might abuse the word love for some time .But noot for a long period of time. If you still do .You're a dog . And your first love is put to an example . That was the time we ALL thought we were in love But it was just another puppy love crap .


God's love is really the best .And the second would go to family.
God's love is unconditional unlike humans i think we all have our conditions.
Nonone says i love you forever and next year he/she over you . Noone says i love you and the next day says you don't have a heart. It does not take a day to fall in love nor get out . Unless your love is that cheap then maybe so . There's a different between like and love. It can take a day to like someone or get out but NEVER love .


Together forever ?Just another saying us humans abused.

My SATURDAY day out .

As the early sun rise ,we all got up and got ready to head to the cemetery .
Some bathed and as usual some DIDN'T .LOL.
Visited papa and a few other ppl .
Not long ago ,it was my papa's birthday .
So thats why we're heading there .
Located in Cheras .I think i'm gonna be burried there too .


Papa's grave?



And this is what happens to the poor old grave yard next to papa's .
Terrible .



Thiss picture caught my eye !


Damn unique lol !















Ganas -nyaa ?!





















You we're suppose to be visiting the grave next to it !
Complete strangers.ARGH






After cemetery ,we grabbed lunch at food planet .

Then later on jalan jalan. to Sentul ?just for a mosquito netting ?lolol.Then headed
to sunway to get Cousins present.


So true (:

Thursday, September 17, 2009

BREAK.

Ah yesh the holidays are here :D
Selamat Hari Raya niggass !

I fancy there are more holidays this year than previously.
is it true D: ?

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

The very next day of camp.

Which was monday !i skipped school happily :D
Ahh i needed a break and so i slept at 9.30pm and got up at 2pm .Crazy skeelz i have.
Damn blady long !i woke up feeling shitty and now still with that feeling .
I kinda feel sick but maybe it's just all in my head.
My throat kinda hurts .Can't drink water properly..
And MY NOSE !
A BLOCK nose .I'm suppose to be healthy.argh.

And for me this friday won't have school !
AH YESH .ILIKEIT*

The newspaper mentioned about those school who wants to have an early holiday may apply
or some crap to the ministry of pendidikan or some shit like that.
THANK GOD MY SCHOOL DID.
Laughs@ppl who has school on friday!

Mmm, it's been a very long time since i've used the words iloveyou to mom or dad.
That day on sunday was the first to my mom since god knows when .
And literally ''god knows when'' min of at least 4-5years ago ?
And sadly i only said it because it was a responds to my mom's iloveyou, cause seriously i'm not used to saying iloveyou to my parents.Yesh very sad indeed.
Thank god i didn't bring down on that day .I CONTROLLED IT!

And it felt damn good saying it .

Monday, September 14, 2009

Camp footages.



Ben loses to martin jalleh !LAWAK.






Chinese VS Indians !










Chinese VS Indians (After peace making)








Sakit JIWA.











Teacher Aaron West SINGS!










Elizabeth SINGS!

Sorry unable to catch every activity due to me lmao .

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Camp .

Confirmation camp 09.
first ever camp.11,12&13 Sept.
Theme ;Making a difference.

Tears were shed ,lessons were learnt.

Camp was speechless !Terlalu awesome :D It was located at The Farm ,Negeri Sembilan.A famous location foc SIC to carry out camps .Martin jalleh was our spokesman.Our ClassTeachers; Philo ,Millian ,Aaron ,Michael,Edward and Alphonso attended too.
He gave talks about life and so ..BGR sadly was postponed to another date due to lack of time.
But he promised to come down and find the time to give us that talk during class.
He stays in penang if i'm not mistaken.All lessons were meaningful.Every small activity had something to do with his
lesson ,which does summarize and keeps the teens alive .Sitting down too long can cause PROBLEMS!Sleepless nights it was .AHAH what to do .Got mates, confirm la noisy skit !
SO YESH .Suprisingly i took cold bath at 7am when i only manage to do that at 8 plus !
AH IMPROVEMENT.LMAO.And early mornings we gays have to fight for the toiletss .I think
there was only 2 bathroom with heaters in it .Didn't matter much ..And during camp
is pretty much eat eat eat !
breakfast ,tea ,lunch ,dinner & supper .I mean wtfbbq?(i don't know what it means but sounds cool:D) ARGH crazy stuff.Ah playing in the lake filled with wastages like shit ,animal food ETC
WASN'T MUCH FUN BUT FRIGGIN DISGUSTING AND I HATED WHEN I TER-SWALLOW THE WATER..Thank god i was in the boat most of the time.
With blady sheldon that ASS is an idiot which makes him funny..That idiot only wnats to tumble the boat when we're on it .Punk ass fella .The water dah disgusting and polluted.
eeee .Shit disgusting and yet we ppl are so smart to still enter it ?

The camp really taught me alot and yesh i'll learn from it .
I needed something in my life to come by and yesh god blessed me with this camp.
I'm so thankful for it .
I'm just hoping to rebuild myself.My previous self did not satisfy me nor does the present.
Trying to change and not letting anyone get in the way .You get in the way ,you'll just pist me off.
I have a problem with who i am now and i'm gonna change it .If you can't help me in doing so
don't .Just stay out .I guess, i can do it by myself slowly.


I thank you Martin Jalleh ,God bless you abundantly.
You are gifted.See you soon .
Now playing:Clicking the restart button in life.

Small small footages will be on the next post ,enjoyy (:

Stop hating and start smiling.




Thursday, September 10, 2009

Oblivious.

I have an anger i can't control .It's time you open your eyes and start realizing .
Now lets see what the free butterfly does . .

Saturday, September 5, 2009

DLSR ! / DSLR ! *


Aaaaaaaaah photography would be what i wanna do later on !
I can't imagine the images i capture in my head in everyday life but sadly without a camera to
actually friggin capture it?
It's quite a sad thing !
And at times i'll use my phone to capture it .
My phone won't really get much if it's a distant picture though.
Which is sad.Like really.

I wouldn't mind one of those nikon dlsr/dslr .AND ONLY NIKON !
Aaaah.Currently in mind a D80 or D40 BUT D90 can shoot vid unlike d80 & 40.ARGH.And i also saw this new lumix camera,is in RED.g1 LUMIX if i'm not mistaken .It's not bad and all but you gotta get the flash seperate and i'm not sure if there's the extender.I forgot.PLS if you have a dlsr, gimme some info and if it isn't
too hard hand me the cam for a day would do :DI really needa check this shit out.

The cost of this bloody thing would be ?around 2.5k ?more or less.WAIT IT SHOULD BE AT 2.5K AND ABOVE.Wow i mean.Wtf.SADLY ,IT'S TOO MUCH A KID
CAN SAVE.LOL.
Just planning to work in that 2months break and hoping to get min 1.5k or some shit.
AHH how to earn money fast man ,teach PLEASE.
Ah it's friggin bullshit ..I MEAN IS IMPOSSIBLE TO GET IT.I mean it's equivalent to a friggin laptop.HMMM, i think i should talk to uncle albert :Di think he knows alot.Or at least more than
me.OH MAN this sucks ,what should i do.MMM .

Drought's over.

After years of waiting for the com to be fixed ..It crashed due to ''i don't know''
& NOW IT'S FIXED.
Ah that means .Wait wtf does it actually mean ?
NO IDEA.
Noww i can continue blogging .
HERE'S THE NEXT POST.